Call it pick on JMU week.
Bobby Lamb’s soul mate Mickey Matthews spoke out recently on the real reason his team failed to advance far in the playoffs last year. It wasn’t cause App State beat his fumblin’ Dukes. It wasn’t cause that
dominating overhyped CAA schedule wore ‘em down. And it wasn’t cause their postseason seeding wasn’t higher.
Nope. It’s because they were missing somebody. Stupid injury.
When the 10th-year James Madison football coach was asked about the return of tailback Eugene Holloman – who missed most of last season with a knee injury – here’s what he said.
“I think he’s the best back in the country,” Matthews said this week. “His injury last year cost us the national championship. You look at our games, if we had him playing, we would have won. The other running backs were thrust into a role they weren’t ready to assume. … He was the one guy we couldn’t afford to lose.”
The report further noted that the game at App State “was a one-point loss sealed when a freshman tailback – playing in Holloman’s place – fumbled.”
In light of this new claim that JMU was really the best team in FCS last season if only this one back had played, the following statements were released:
Washington Redskins – We’d have beaten the Seahawks and swept into the Super Bowl, if only Jason Campbell hadn’t gotten injured
UNC – We’d have beaten Kansas and won the Final Four, if only Brandan Wright hadn’t gone pro
LA Lakers – We’d have beaten Boston and won the title, if only Jason Kidd had agreed to a trade
Furman – We’d have won the last two national titles, if only we’d been able to recruit a certain in-state QB
Joker – I’d have reigned chaos in Gotham, if only Harvey Dent hadn’t gotten killed
Chris Carter – My latest X-Files movie would be ruling the box office, if only I’d made it five years earlier
Average two year old – I’d have stopped crying 20 minutes ago, if only mommy would let me have some candy
Mickey Matthews – I’d have beaten App State, if only I’d been logical and either kicked an easy field goal or tried to run out the clock*
* Would never be believed. Never.