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Post-#Stink: Sleep Aid

Photo by Andrew Dye, Winston-Salem Journal

One losing streak ended Thursday night in Boone while another was extended. No, it wasn’t pretty for App State. But after a frustrating rough patch, a win is a win.

And this was no ordinary victory. Oh, Hell no! This was any season’s sweetest victory, a #HateWeek win over those hated Georgia Southern Eagles #Stink

The final score was 27-6, but once those sleepwalking Mountaineers woke up, it wasn’t really that close. The Eagles have, for reasons of hubris and perhaps ignorance, de-clawed themselves. #Stink hung around for a while, but c’mon, Southern has nothin’.

#Stink is bad. Really, really bad.

But a win over one’s rival is always more satisfying than others. That’s three straight by the ‘Neers over the Eagles. And, while we’d prefer to be 8-2 rather than 6-4, there is a silver lining in App State earning bowl eligibility against Jaw-Jaw Suthern.

So enjoy this one, App Nation. Pop open a cold one tonight and savor another win over GSU…


…But, man oh man, was that hard to watch. The Eagles are dull, and the once-exciting Mountaineers are anything but flashy. (And ESPNU announcers Mark Neely and Jay Walker made those three very – very – long hours.)

No matter if you were live at chilly The Rock – and there were a couple thousand fewer of you there than this blogger expected, hmm – or watching from the climate-controlled comfort of your home, kudos to you if you didn’t drift off to dreamland once we finally – finally – got to the fourth quarter.

Here’s a brief timeline of one AppFan’s night watching what has to be one of the dullest App State-Georgia Southern games ever:

7:33ish p.m. – ESPNU’s Walker refers to App State QB Taylor Lamb as “Tyler,” despite calling a handful of Mountaineer games already this season. First sign of the long night ahead…

7:55ish – Your blogger doesn’t even bother to turn from the kitchen while plating some dinner as GSU tries to pick up a 3rd-and-short. Outcome seemed certain. It was. First down Eagles.

8:01 – Eagles score first for the first time in 10 games. 3-0 Birds at The Rock. Your blogger cracks open another beer and tweets: “I. Don’t. Like. This.”

8:10ish – Walker proclaims App is playing “Georgia Tech.” It’s a school night with an early call, but damn, where’s that shot glass?!

8:12 – Another App State drive is stopped…by App State. Just when Marcus Williams Jr. – who this blogger is ready to declare the next product of Running Back U – found some room and the right side of the App OL cleared the way, one of his teammates would hold someone in a white jersey. It happens too often lately.

8:21 – Eagles in control. App is kind of just…also on the field. Your blogger fears the worst, and tweets: “If one’s favorite team loses to 3 bad teams in a row, does that mean one’s team also is bad? Asking for a friend…”

8:42ish – Up 7-3 and facing a 4th-and-less than a yard from his own 36 – and trying to give his offense ANY spark, Coach Visor goes for it. Williams was met by a gang of Eagles. We get it. Desperate times and all… This blogger eyed the fridge, but held back. Somehow. He fired off a tweet using the F-bomb. Seemed fitting.

8:45ish – Neely explains how tackling helps. Good grief. Why us?! What did we do to deserve these announcers?

Shortly before 9 – Your blogger watches in disbelief as the ESPNU camera catches App fans in the end zone bleachers going nuts as freshman Chandler Staton easily makes a 52-yard FG to put the Apps up 10-3 at the break. State of the program: Freaking out about three-pointers.

Shortly after 9 – ESPNU’s Walker gives his signature top-5 list. It’s bad shtick, but this is something he does well. Neely is his semi-able sidekick. They get it mostly correct, though Jerry Moore at No. 4 of his 5 App facts seemed low. But their shtick. It’s much. Meaning bad.

9:15 – The dog needs to go out. Thanks, buddy, for giving me a break from Williams right-Williams up the gut-Lamb incomplete-punt. Man’s best friend, indeed.

Around 10 – Another App diehard texts to asks if your blogger is still awake with App now leading 20-6. “Barely,” is the reply. Williams right, Williams up the middle, Lamb throws it away, punt. The Eagles weren’t much better – worse, in fact. There was no #Fun in this Belt clash…

10:15 – App is control. In the past, measures would have been attempted to stay awake. Instead, as the #FunBelt officials conduct yet another lengthy review, your blogger welcomes – no, begs for – sleep to arrive. Reviews help erode the NFL product. Will someone please step in before the same happens to CFB?!

Minutes later – Your blogger wakes with the ‘Neers knocking on the door, or so it appears. Everyone is just standing around. Coach Visor is chewing gum manically and looking annoyed. Lamb has hands on hips, looking, well, dreamy. Marcus Williams adjusts his jersey to reveal some abs. (#Pause) The review seems endless. Yosef even looks bored. This is barely football. Back to slumber.

12:03 a.m. – Snaps awake. ESPNU is still on, but that ain’t The Rock on the screen. Reached for the mobile device, checked score. Reminded self to never again gripe about those 3:30p home starts or odd 5:30p road kickoffs. Made for teevee, this one wasn’t.


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